My New Superpower

So this weekend I finally (finally!) got to move into my private bedroom in the apartment I'm living in. I'd been living in the shared room all summer, staring longingly at the private room (but not when the girl living there was home because that would be creepy) in anticipation of my chance to move in and have at last have my own space. And now I'm finally here! It's wonderful. But anyway, I was unpacking and moving my things in when I happened upon a smallish leopard-print box in which I recalled having stored certain keepsakes and the like in the past. Wondering if there might be any pictures I could decorate my boring white walls with, I opened it up and took a look. Inside I discovered, to my mild surprise, many assorted mementos from near-relationships past (interestingly enough, I seem to have kept nothing from my actual relationships...which I don't regret, because those boys were lame). As I was looking through them all again, re-reading the notes and letters and remembering why the random objects were significant, the song "To Love Somebody" sung by Damien Rice & Ray LaMontagne suddenly came on my computer's playlist and started playing. I looked up to realize that the words "Baby you don't know what it's like, baby you don't know what it's like, to love somebody, to love somebody, the way I love you" were underscoring everything I was reading. It was weird, and it reaffirmed my growing suspicion that my life is actually a weekly hour-long dramedy beloved by the Gilmore Girls crowd. I have included the song in this post for maximum effect.

This got me thinking, though. See, when I was a freshman here at BYU, my friends and I all came up with superhero names for each other, like Ridiculous Girl and the Fickle Female. I was dubbed Captain Confusion, and my power was the ability to irritate my enemies to death by constantly asking what was going on. Yeah, I was pretty clueless as a freshman. Now that I'm a senior though, and considerably wiser (suuuuure you are, you're saying. Well, I say shut up), I think I should be a new superhero. They could call me The Rejector. I'll have the super ability to damage my enemies' self-esteems so badly that a fight won't even have to take place. Think how effective I could be! Big, bad enemies and monsters could come up and I could just be like, "You know, you're a really great bad guy and all, but I'm just not interested in fighting you. I'm sure you'll make some other crime-fighter very happy...or miserable, which ever one you want to do." Or, "Wow, you're a really scary monster, and I'm really flattered that you want to destroy me, but I'm really not ready for a fight right now. It's not you, it's me." Or I could be really cruel and just say, "Huh - what? Oh, I'm sorry, I was too busy trying to beat up this villain over here to notice you." I would make SUCH a devastating superhero. Wow.

So there's something for all you comic book (or sorry - "graphic novel") creators out there to consider. Me, I'll just be going about my merry way, utterly oblivious to the destruction left in my wake. After all, just as Nightwing will always be remembered as Robin*, so I shall always be a little Captain Confusion.

*So I've got some comic book nerd in me. Get over it.